This post is a little bit of everything including the holiday synopsis.
We made it through the holidays though there were many times I just wanted to ignore them, seriously thought about taking down the tree and decorations and just not dealing with it but I persevered and an interesting thing occurred....it was okay. :o) I actually feel like we turned a corner at Christmas time and that the new year truly brought the beginnings of moving on.
A couple of weeks ago Glory's car broke and the repair outweighed the worth of the vehicle. This lead to a heart stopping realization of how tenuous my financial situation still is...I cannot afford a car payment at all and neither can she. We were very blessed by Tiffany's in-laws loaning her a car while we worked things out. I was able to close out a CD that my grandmother left me and use the money to purchase another vehicle for Glory but we were working with a very limited budget. The process of finding a car began. We searched ads, asked friends, made phone calls and finally wandered used car lots. Last weekend we found some "hopeful" vehicles (at the last lot we looked at). To make a long story short I spoke with the owner of the lot and arranged to drive the car and have my son-in-law check out the car (he is a mechanic). I was able to purchase her car yesterday which has brought a tremendous sense of relief to both of us. However, this was a very stressful decision to make. I was responsible for choosing a vehicle that was affordable and reliable. It was the first time in my life where I could not afford a car note, had a very limited budget, had to make the "right" choice and the decision was mine to make for somebody else. I don't know if you have been faced with that type of decision but it is tough knowing that it is all on you and it had to be right. I probably am not articulating this very well but I am glad it is done. Time will tell on the reliability part but the car appeared to be very well maintained and checked out good and Glory is ecstatic to have her own wheels again.
This weekend also brought the need to rearrange and reassign the use of a room. I am taking my office which currently (and messily I might add) houses my work/teaching stuff and my crafting stuff and converting it back into a bedroom. So now I have to relocate these things in an organized and sensible manner. (Yep, I am laughing on the inside at that one!!) My plan begins with deciding the locations for the "stuff" then map out exactly how it will work. The craft things will be relocated to a corner in the family room and the teaching "stuff" including quite a children's library will be relocated to my patio room which, if all goes well, will double as my home gym. We will see how that works out. Today's task was to map out the location and basically what/how I would organize things. I decided to use Clint's 2-drawer filing cabinet to hold my crafting/scrap booking paper. This decision meant cleaning out his filing cabinet. The task while simple was wrought with emotions as I sorted through papers he kept. I sorted things into categories - keep, shred, and trash. Easy until I came across things that brought me to tears ....a card I had given him expressing how much I loved him, a father's day card from Glory, some old pictures etc. Not an easy task today but it is done. It brought the realization that as time is passing and I am moving into what is now my life there is less and less of him in our surroundings and more of me. This is normal I know but bittersweet all the same.
"I can do everything through him who gives me strength" Phil 4:13
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